Saturday, 21 September 2013


Layla is now unwell. She was up all night vomiting and now asleep on the couch. I hate seeing her unwell but I have never been more relieved that she is unwell. Her symptoms are similar to Jayden's and i am now banking on it all being a virus. Hoping that the wobbly ness on his feet yesterday was just because he had little to eat and that I can now breathe...at least thats what I'm hoping.

Unlike Layla, Jayden woke up much better. Still pale in the face and grey under his eyes, but happy. I was so relieved to see that smile. Thank god for small mercies.

I know I won't stop worrying and I know this is not going to be the last time I'm stressed beyond reason but I am going to make the most of the NOW. I don't have a choice, it's just how it is. As good as it gets.

I'm still watching him like a crazy person, I know that will never stop. I will never stop worrying but for this moment I'm hoping with all my might that it, is, ok to breathe.


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