Monday, 13 January 2014

Layla, Jayden and I went out today to buy some things from the shop. They are so lovely to take out. Jayden is so easily pleased and never asks to have anything. He just loves to come with us. No matter what we are looking at he's happy to look and help too. He made me smile when he was looking for bathers with me. He was picking the ones he thought would be best for me. Loved it. Didn't buy any but it was lots of fun to look with him. Layla too. He particularly loved looking for shoes for Layla. So sweet.

On the way home we stopped at a park. It was really lovely. Layla makes him so happy. He has so much fun with her. There was a swing there that he could safely fit into without falling so I was able to push him a little higher than usual. As he swung, His laughter was so loud and hard that he had both Layla and I laughing out loud with him. Just precious. It was such a brilliant moment and I really wanted to write this entry just so I could mention it. He was so happy. He was laughing so hard that he couldn't talk. And when he did he said "not so high" with a big giggle! Hilarious. And after going on everything else he wanted to get back on the swing for another go and again laughed and laughed. Truly wonderful. I want to remember that moment for as long as I live. That laugh, that smile, every bit of that moment .

I had left my phone at home so i couldn't take any photos. I was left to live the moments and hope I could rely on my memory to keep them alive, hopefully forever. It felt weird as I always have my phone and I'm always snapping photos. But today. None. In a lot of ways it was better. I actually got to give my 100% into the moment instead of desperately trying to capture it in a photo.

He's having such a lovely time with the kids at home. Dreading them going back to school. Wish I could flag school altogether and just have them all home spending time together. It's what matters more than any assignment. That's how I feel anyway.

I'm tired. It's late. Just put my daughter to bed and now I'm sitting in my room listening to all the snoring going on in here.

Looking at both my little men. So peaceful. Boys who I hope one day will both be men. I know that they will be good men. Kind. Loving. Good. I hope so much they get to be those men, together. Both of them, grow old. Together. Brothers, forever.

The taps dripping in the bathroom and I know I have to get up and stop it. It pauses for a few seconds. Then drips again.
That's it. Got to stop it.

Done.

I'm going to go to bed now. I just wanted to write about Jayden and the swing. I don't have a photo of that moment, only a beautiful picture in my head, and I hope this blog entry will easily bring that memory back, the picture. The moment. Always.




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