Sunday, 2 March 2014

The weekend

Saturday morning

As I hung my clothes out on the line today I could see my dear old neighbour. Just the top of his head but it was enough to see his sadness. Hunched over and moving slowly, I knew he was missing his wife. It is wonderful and fortunate for her that she had such a long life and for them both to have had so much time together, but that doesn't make it hurt any less for him. It was so sad to see him there on his own. She would have hated to see him like that.
Wish I could take his pain away.

Layla's guinea pig died last night. He had surgery at the vets as they discovered a huge gall stone in his bladder. But sadly he didn't survive the night. Layla is crushed and doesn't understand why she's losing so many. However the ones that have passed recently are old. But so sad for her. She loves her animals so much. I'm proud of her in that she's able to let her emotions out. She cries when she loses them, is very sad for a time and then she's ok again. It's so healthy to see her work through the emotions but sad to see her have to have them.

Inside I'm so sad for my son and spend my days suppressing those emotions in order to get on with life. I try to live in the moment and not think about the future but somedays that's impossible. But as I watched my neighbour this morning and my daughter after discovering her guinea pig died I also ached for them as well. Their pain may be different but it still hurts. When I'm caught up in so much sadness of my own it's difficult to see others pain. But it's there and I saw it today.
Lots of hugs to my daughter today, plenty of TLC.

In the afternoon we discovered Layla's other special guinea pig was pregnant so that definitely put a smile back on her face. Nice.

Jayden did some lovely painting today. Just love his pictures. He takes so much time with all the detail when he does them. Lots of concentration going on with picking the colours and where to place them. Just love watching him get busy with it. So clever.

I hope with all my might he gets to grow to be what he wants to be. A painter, a policeman, whatever he desires. I hope he gets that.


It's Sunday night and the end of another weekend. We had a really lovely weekend where on both Saturday and today we had guests. Saturday was spent with a beautiful family we have met through this journey and quickly grown to love and Sunday was spent with Danny's brother and his family.
The kids were so happy to spend time with both.

Luke's worrying me quite a bit at the moment as he doesn't seem himself at all and seems to be going up and down with feeling unwell. I can't help but raise the alarm bells within me when I see my kids sick. Obviously Jayden sets them off screaming louder but I still stress with the other two. So as Luke sat on the couch today looking really pale, inside I was thinking the worst. That might seem ridiculous but that's just how my mind works now and there's no way of stopping that train of thought.

He went to bed early and didn't eat much for dinner. Really worried. Jayden is doing ok and had a great day yesterday with his mate and then another great day with his cousins. He loves it when we has visitors. So nice to see him happy. He did complain that he wasn't well too and of course panic sets in. I've just put them both to bed and they took no time at all to fall asleep. I hope they both wake feeling better.

Jayden and I playing with silly sunnies!

Jayden at the park

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